im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
My pants zipper is stuck halfway down. I have to interview an intern later. This day is gonna be amazing,
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
