you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
Randomize
