Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
There's a naked man in my car right now.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
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