There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
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