She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
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