Even the bartender felt bad for me
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
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