D3 body, D1 cock
he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
At the funeral we'll say nice things, like "She was delightfully extreme, psychotically wonderful, and could probably drink all you fuckers under the table."
That's literally the perfect eulogy
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
Randomize
