she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
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