My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Randomize
