who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
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