didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
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