My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
Do you know why I woke up with a half peeled lemon in my purse with a post-it that said "eat me" on it?
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
Randomize
