Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
So called my VP's house on Sunday drunk and told him that if he didn't hire me for the new position I would skull fuck his wife. They asked me to go home today. Thanks again Vodka
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
Randomize
