i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
I woke up at 2 AM to find them in my living room with a radio flyer wagon full of milk glass plates and a Holstein cow. How am I going to explain this to my landlord!?!
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
Randomize
