Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
Randomize