i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
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