I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
So, remember how that one doctor said it was 1 in a million that I'd get pregnant...
Yeeah thank god
Well..welcome to parenting Mr. one in a million.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
