my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Randomize
