I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
Randomize