I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
I see more hoeing in ur future
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
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