WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
Just pee around me
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
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