Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
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