Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
I just realized I haven't looked at our horoscopes lately. If mine says anything about tweakers, I'm burning my phone.
Oh shit oh shit oh shit.
BURN THE PHONE.
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
Randomize
