You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
Watching her eat just hurts me
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
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