He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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