How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
And you know what the worst part is? Because of him I can now relate to a goddamn Taylor Swift song. FUCK. MY. LIFE.
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