So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
Randomize