i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
You bought champagne and told everyone it was because I'd just found out I was pregnant. How exactly is that being a good wingman?
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night