with your own penis?
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
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