Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
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