This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
Randomize
