i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
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