yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
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She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
So the woman who sold us weed at the park is pregnant. With another small child. And the basket she used to carry the joints is decorated with Barney stickers.
She's like a yuppie Nancy Botwin. She just gets better and better.
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I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
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