Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
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