It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
you win again, gameday.
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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