with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
I faked an abortion last night.
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
God, you're like boner-b-gone
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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