They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
Thank you for not boning my boss.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
Randomize
