Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
splinters make it hard to masturbate
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
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