just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
