Since she's grinding up on your thigh right now, I'm sending you this text hoping it makes your phone vibrate in her vagina
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
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