You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
you will always have a special place in my vag
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize
