Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
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