I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
im six kinds of drunk right now
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
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