I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
Randomize
