Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
You know you have a problem when you walk into your bathroom find kettle one in your shower and a note you wrote yourself when drunk that says "panties at jared leto's" on your counter
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
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