I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
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