Whats the glycemic index on semen?
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
Randomize
