Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize