I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
I can tuck mytits in my pants
She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
Randomize
