i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
Todays life lesson brought to you by last nights half pitchers of cheap sangria: you'll never get the stain or the SMELL of sangria vomit out of your bedroom carpet.
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
Lord give me the strength to not check my tinder messages at my grandmother's wake.
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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